The mutterings of a half-mad Canuck who writes stuff

Author: MS Manz (Page 2 of 5)

What’s In My Toolbox?

If anyone ever asks me a question about my writing process, I like to think they will probably ask me what tools I use to get things done (or fail to get things done, as is more often the case). No one has ever asked me this question, or really any question about my writing, but nonetheless in this post I’ll go through a quick list an exhaustive list of the things I use in my writing, with a brief description of why and how I use them.

Just in case anyone ever wants to know.

Pen and Paper

Yes, that’s right. I’m old school.

I have an A4-sized (8.5×11 for the North Americans in the room) clipboard with a small stack of copy paper (80gsm for those keeping score) on my desk at all times. My pen of choice is the Uniball Eye (or the Snowhite Galaxy which is a clone of the Unball) 0.5 roller pen. The part number is Mitsubishi UB-150 if you’re interested in picking some up.

I find I plan a lot better on paper than I do on a screen. Ideas flow more freely and are of a generally higher quality when I’m handwriting. Oh, and yes – I write in cursive.

Software

ClickUp

I’m an idiot who can’t seem to focus on fewer than 5 projects at a time, so I need something to keep track of all the bits and bobs I’m working on. This is where ClickUp comes in.

The free version is honestly more than enough for a single person operation such as myself, but I pay for the first paid tier just so I can have Gantt charts. I love me a Gantt chart. It’s a pretty straightforward project management platform, and it keeps my tasks available to me on all of my devices. I’d be lost without it.

Obsidian

Obsidian is a fairly straightforward markdown editor. It is also one of the most flexible and powerful note-taking and knowledge management systems ever created by mortal man. I have to admit I’ve drunk of the Obsidian kool-aid.

I have no regrets.

I use Obsidian to keep track of story ideas, plot structures, stuff for my day job, information for online classes I’m taking, information for online classes I’m creating… Basically, anything I don’t want to have to keep in my brain all the time, but that I’ll need to have in my brain at some later time goes into Obsidian. I don’t want to take the time to go into details on its use here, but it is so very well worth the Google if you are at all interested in learning things and keeping track of information.

Scrivener

I mean, of course I do.

I’ve thoroughly tested played around with other options: Wavemaker Cards, Obsidian (for drafting of prose rather than just for knowledge management), yWriter, iA Writer (for writing on my e-Ink Android tablet), and even some online services, though I am fundamentally opposed to storing my work only in someone else’s cloud. Basically, if it comes up as an alternative to Scrivener in a Google search, and it isn’t Apple only, I’ve tried it. I keep coming back to Scrivener. Even though it doesn’t run on Android (more on that later)

Aeon Timeline

This is a recent addition to my process (like, yesterday recent) and is largely the impetus for this blog post because it forced me to reconsider my entire writing process from start to finish.

Aeon Timeline has been around for a while, and I actually bought version 2 back in 2016, but didn’t find it useful enough to bother with it much. Enter two of my current flock of projects: “Tomorrow”, and my Interactive Fiction Lunden novel.

Tomorrow is a set of three concurrent novellas whose characters never directly interact (much) but whose storylines affect each other a great deal. I will need to make sure that all of the various things happen in a logical timeframe relative to each other.

The Interactive Fiction novel is, as the name suggests, interactive. I’m also planning to write four different stories, with four different protagonists, where all four interact with each other and the reader can choose which of the protagonists to inhabit. That means it’s going to be rife with complicated interactions that are dependent on reader choices. It’s a total mindfuck to plan. Aeon Timeline should help tremendously in keeping all the details sensibly organized.

Twine

Speaking of the Interactive Fiction novel(s) – I’ll be writing them in Twine. Twine is a piece of software designed for the creation of interactive fiction. I haven’t done any more than install it and poke around randomly a bit, but it looks like it’s exactly what I need in order to do what I want to do. I’ll keep you updated as things develop.

Hardware

Keyboard

I take my keyboard very seriously. About two years ago I took a deep dive into the world of custom mechanical keyboards. I tried just about every style and variety of case, switch, keycap, and layout you can think of to find out what exactly works best for me.

My overall favourite is the Keydous NJ80-AP with Keychron kPro Mint 65g switches and my Autumn Fog clone OEM keycaps. I own three of this keyboard, though I built one of them out with Outemu silent whites for when I’m working in an environment that wouldn’t appreciate my clackitty-clacking away.

This will all make perfect sense to any other keyboard nerds out there, and absolutely none to anyone else.

For when I need to be portable (though I almost never need to be portable, I have Keychron K7 Pro (reds, of course) which is surprisingly useable stock. It’s tiny and smol and I like it more than I thought I would.

Computers (traditional)

I have a desktop computer with very beefy (for three years ago) specs and dual 27″ monitors on swivel arms (and a third 13″ monitor in my vocal booth) because I do video content creation as well as writing.

My laptop is a Acer Swift 5, which was one or two versions behind current when I bought it. I chose the older one because it had a less powerful graphics card which means an hour or two more battery life in real-world use cases. It also does video out via usb-c, which I’ll get to in a minute. It’s a tiny little thing and replaces my old Dell XPS 15 which now lives in the music room and is used for music production almost exclusively.

Computers (non-traditional)

Display

In combination with my tiny little laptop, I use a pair of XREAL Air 2 Pro AR glasses, generally with the Beam accessory. This is why it was important for my laptop to output video via usb-c. The glasses project a very large, reasonably crisp screen in front of me, and with the beam I can anchor it in space wherever I choose. The pro 2 version (which replaced my old version 1s) also have electrochromic dimming, so when I’m writing I can darken them completely and focus on my main screen and when I’m doing admin work I can clear them up and go dual monitor with my laptop screen.

If I’m gonna write science fiction I should go full cyborg, right?

Tablet

I have two Boox e-ink android tablets. The 10″ Note Air lives in my vocal booth now, and I use it for scripts and books I’m narrating. My 13″ Max 3 is my workhorse. It’s A4 sized, so I can read most pdf files at native resolution. I can also split the screen and put something I’m editing on one side and take notes on the other. The handwriting recognition is almost flawless, so I can actually do a lot of planning and that type of work on it and then export my work as copy/paste-able text which I can then throw into scrivener or obsidian. Hell, it’s a full-fledged android tablet. I have Obsidian installed on it. I can write stuff directly into Obsidian.

This device, by the way, is the reason I’m annoyed that Scrivener doesn’t have even a bare-bones Android version. The e-ink screen on this thing is a joy to use. I can connect my keyboard to it via Bluetooth and type away on a screen that doesn’t hurt my eyes (even over the course of an entire day). If Scrivener had a useable Android app, I’d have my end-game writing setup immediately sorted.

Phone

When I replaced my phone last time, I made a move from my OnePlus 7tPro, which was my third OnePlus phone in a row (and I don’t upgrade my phone more than once every 4 years or so ) to the Samsung Galaxy S22+. I did this for one simple reason: Dex.

Dex is a feature of (some, most… I’m not sure) Samsung phones that provides the user with a full desktop computing experience when the phone is connected to an external display. My XREAL glasses are an external display. It is a beautifully functional pairing.

If I’m on the go and I have my phone and my glasses (almost always the case) I can connect them and have instant productivity. I don’t have Scrivener on my phone, of course, but I do have google docs. I also have the microphone built in to the glasses and I can set the phone to work as a trackpad when using Dex. This means I can open up a google doc, and dictate through my Google keyboard’s speech to text option using the microphone next to my face. If I have a scene I want to draft, or some ideas I want to flesh out while I’m on the go (something more involved than just a list of things, which I can do more easily with just the phone), this works exceptionally well.

As a bit of an aside, once I had the phone I decided to replace my fitbit with the Galaxy watch 5 and got a pair of the Buds 2 pro because I wanted to see what an Apple level of device integration felt like and I will never willingly use an Apple product. Reader, it changed my life. I highly recommend it. It almost makes me understand Apple users.

Okay guys, it’s time to wrap it up…

So that’s all of the tools that I use regularly to get my writing work done.

This kind of blog post is what I do when I’m avoiding actually doing any of that writing work.

If you are interested in more information on any of the individual things I mentioned here, drop me a comment and let me know. I’d be happy to go into more detail. Also make sure to subscribe

to get my future posts delivered right to the burner email address of your choice.

Oh, also, if you want to gain unlimited access to all of my world building resources (for a writing project of your own, perhaps) and a minimum of two new short stories a month from yours truly, head over to my Patreon and sign up for one of my reasonably priced tiers. You’ll be helping to support my work and helping me to entertain you all at the same time and all for the price of a coffee or two a month.

Cheers!

Something Nifty This Way Waddles

I’ve been chipping away lately at several aspects of a number of inter-related projects that, collectively, make up one doozy of a major endeavor and I thought it might be fun to update both of you on what those projects are and how they inter-relate. Or something to that effect.

I can’t remember if I’ve mentioned it here previously or not, but I’m taking a deep dive in to world building. At the moment I’m building out the world for my Bloodlines novel – 1885 alternate-timeline Victorian London with monsters and magic. It’s called Lunden, and I’m having a glorious time fleshing out my map and deciding which things should be historically accurate, which things totally unique, and which things somewhere in the middle.

This worldbuilding project is happening on World Anvil, and will include a bunch of tools to help other writers write stories in my world, as well as materials for TTRPG players and DMs to run campaigns in good ol’ Lunden. I’ll eventually have stuff for Pathfinder (d20), Open d6, and FATE role-playing systems.

The reason I’m doing all this world-building work is partly to help me with my writing, but also so that I can offer access to it via my Patreon, which I’m currently in the process of setting up. In an ideal world, I’ll get enough financial support from my patrons that I can really focus on writing and other creative things.

In order to promote the Patreon (and my work in general), I’ve also started streaming again (or will have done by the time you read this). I’ll be on Kick and on Twitch, as well as on YouTube live (I think – I haven’t gotten that working yet).

I tried streaming some world building sessions here and there over the past few weeks, but I wasn’t happy with how that worked out. I really need deep concentration for world building in a way that I don’t need as much for writing. When I’m writing I can dip in and out without losing too much momentum, but for world building I really can’t work that way. I’m also (and this is probably a more important issue) bouncing around between multiple windows and so forth much more when world building than when I’m writing, and that makes it awkward to live stream. So I think I’ll stick to writing live streams and leave the world building stuff to when I’m all by my lonesome.

And on the topic of writing, I have a new writing project that I’ve just started actively working on (plotting and story structure stuff) today.

I had initially planned to write a series of more-or-less unconnected short stories set in Lunden as a way of exploring the world and establishing the look and feel of the place. I have forty or so loosey-goosey plot outlines locked and loaded, ready to go. I spent weeks organizing and tidying them up. So naturally I’ve decided to do something completely sideways to all of that and I’ll be writing an interactive novel (or novella – I’m still not at all sure how long it’s going to be) that has nothing to do with any of the aforementioned short story plot outlines.

The plan at the moment is to write four separate versions of the story, each allowing the reader to “play” a different main character who is navigating the same general set of events. My plan is to publish each of the versions separately, and then to combine them into one mahooosive omnibus version where the reader can choose which character to play at the beginning. I’ll be using Twine to write and publish the stories, and hopefully will be able to publish them in a few places. I’m even going to look at how I might package them up for the Google Play Store and the Apple App Store.

So yeah, that’s what I’m up to these days. Big things are starting to happen and I can only hope that I’ll be able to keep a good head of steam going on all of these moving parts. I’ll try to keep you all up to date on my progress as I progress.

The First Draft

The other day, during my quasi-random internet wanderings (probably on facebook, really) I stumbled upon this quote, which is attributed to Sir Terry of Pratchett.

The first draft is just you telling yourself the story.

Sir Terry of Pratchett

At first blush, this seems just another empty, insipid bit of pop-inspirational drivel – like most of what so many people circulate around the internet. But Sir Terry is one of the wisest and most insightful people to have put words to page over the last two centuries. Sir Terry wrote 41 novels in the Discworld series, 39 of which provide deeply cutting satire and an incisive examination of various aspects of Western society that the vast majority of people take for granted as “just the way things are” (all while simultaneously being absolutely hilarious and charming and lovely), and 2 of which were hamstrung to varying degrees by his dementia and, in the case of the final novel, by having been completed by someone who was not Sir Terry (which in no way tarnishes his legacy). Sir Terry doesn’t do drivel. Sir Terry doesn’t do insipid. If Terry Pratchett said a thing, then it is worth considering that thing, and so I did. And it changed how I think about writing in a pretty fundamental way.

You see, I’ve always been very much a plotting sort of writer. I love me an outline. This is something that’s true of many writers, and in particular of full-time professional writers (something that I still aspire to become). If you are writing for a living, you need to be organized and focused. You don’t have time to faff around for months hammering out a sloppy mess of a first draft, most of which you’ll have to throw away anyway, right? You need to know where you’re going, and you need to get there in a reasonably efficient manner. Pantsing your way through a first draft might possibly be fun and interesting and whatever, but it is not efficient. Outlining gets you there faster and more easily.

I’m fond of saying that everyone outlines, it’s just that some people do it differently. Plotters outline by using bullet lists or the snowflake method or various other tools to cut through the cruft and get to the meat of their story quickly so that they can get down to the business of actually writing that story as quickly as possible. Pantsers also outline, but they do this by wandering their way through hundreds of pages of prose. A plotter’s outline looks like the skeleton of a story, a pantser’s outline looks like a story. But it isn’t a story – not yet – it’s just an outline that’s shaped like story. I mean, I’ve always felt that by building a well-thought-out outline before starting my first draft, I was even taking care of a lot of the work that a first draft is supposed to accomplish. Effectively, my outlined first draft should be the equivalent of a pantser’s second or third draft, right?

But that’s not what an outline does.

An outline doesn’t remove the need for a first draft, because the first draft is just you telling yourself the story, and an outline doesn’t tell you the story. An outline just shows you the shape of the story. Outlining might help you produce a more focused and cohesive first draft, but at the end of the day, both the plotters and the pantser’s first drafts are doing the same job.

One analogy I quite like for this is a sculpting analogy. I’m skeptical of those (like Stephen King) who claim that their stories already exist in the universe and that the job of the writer is to uncover them, to dig them up from the dirt of the ether and present them to the world, but I find this sculpting analogy compelling. It goes like this: the first draft is the writer gathering the raw materials, the marble or whatever that will become the sculpture. Once the materials are gathered, the writer’s job, to paraphrase Michelangelo, is to chip away all the parts that aren’t the story.

Don’t get me wrong, I’ll still be sticking to my outlining and my planning. I find it gives me a much better idea of which parts of the first draft are the story and which ones aren’t. Pantsing gets you your block of marble, but plotting gets you a statue-shaped block of marble and I’d rather start that much closer to where I’m trying to go. Going forward, though, I probably won’t spend nearly as much time nailing down the details in the outline. The level of detail I have historically put into my outlines is largely a waste of time, because the outline is not the place where I should be telling myself the story. That’s what the first draft is for.

Breaking Bad – Season 2, Episode 1

The first episode of a new season is an interesting sort of animal. It has a lot of different hats it has to wear (yes, that was on purpose) and some of them are contradictory. Starting off a new season, it’s important to capture, or re-capture, the interest and excitement with which you ended the previous season. In this type of show you also need to raise the stakes in some way. On top of all that, you also need to lay the groundwork for the upcoming season’s storylines, character development, plot twists and cetera. Oh, and all of this needs to happen with a story that is already in progress.

Tall order, that.

The opening scene is a pretty effective, though perhaps unimaginative way of accomplishing the first task. Replay season 1’s closing scene and use it to remind the audience of exactly where we were when last we met. It reminds us that when it comes to the evils in the world, there are levels. It also reminds us that Walt and Jessie are now very firmly in over their heads, but it reads a bit differently at the beginning of a season than it does at the end of one. As the ending of a season, it comes across as “Oh, holy shit, now what?”. At the start of a season it’s “Oh, holy shit, now what?“. It’s an important distinction. The stakes seem to have been raised significantly and our focus is subtly shifted from what just happened to what’s going to happen next. Walt and Jessie are now playing in the big leagues and they will either rise to the occasion or they will be utterly destroyed.

Now, when it comes to the groundwork for the upcoming storylines, I have a bit of an admission to make, dear reader. I haven’t quite managed to keep my knowledge of the show as spoiler-free as I would have liked. I have stumbled across the odd bit of information here and there such that I know there was a plane crash, though I’m not sure specifically how that will play into the plot of this season. I did catch, however, that the burned teddy bear in the swimming pool was detritus from the crash, and I’m pretty sure the $737,000 that Walt calculates he needs is a reference to a Boing 737. I also know that at some point there will be characters named Saul, Mike, and Gus Fring (thanks a lot YouTube algorithm), though again I have no idea when they show up, or what role they will play in the story.

In terms of threads that have been unplucked from the show’s frayed hem in this episode and are ready to be unravelled over the course of the next 11 episodes or so: we have Walt almost spilling the beans (also on purpose – sorry, not sorry) to Skyler; Walt leaving all the money in the box of diapers where Skyler is almost certain to find it (thereby forcing Walt to finish spilling the beans); the identity of the people who are surveilling Walt and Jessie (probably the big players that Hank mentions, whose toes are likely to get stepped on by someone who needs that much precursor); and of course the abduction of Walt and Jessie by Tuco, who probably thinks those big players are out to get him as he likely doesn’t know what happened to Gonzo other than that he suddenly disappeared.

I’m a bit less interested in the whole Marie/Hank/Skyler shoplifting storyline. It feels a bit tacked on to me, like it was meant to be a piece of smoke and mirrors distraction in season 1 and now the writers aren’t sure what to do with it. It’s important that we not lose sight of the fact that this is all happening as the result of Walt’s choices, and that rather than saving his family, those choices are more or less destroying it, which Skyler’s breakdown in front of Hank demonstrates, but adding in the conflict with her sister really only serves to muddy the waters unnecessarily in my opinion.

All in all, a solid episode that felt a bit slow in places, but laid some very interesting groundwork that I hope to see pay off handsomely in the next several episodes.

Breaking Bad – Season 1, Episode 7

Interesting widening of the scope in this episode. We have Hank’s illegal Cuban cigars, Marie’s shoplifting (presumably some form of compulsive kleptomania-esque behaviour), Walter and Jessie’s chemical robbery and meth production, and then Tuco’s sociopathic murder of one of his own henchmen. As Joe Rogan is fond of saying, “there are levels to this”.

We are presented with an interesting spectrum of law-breakage. As Walter says, “it’s interesting where we choose to draw the line.” We, the audience, are also being invited to decide where we draw the line. What are we willing to accept? Is it acceptable for a DEA agent to use his position to get goods that he could arrest another man for possessing? Few people take the boycott of Cuba very seriously these days, but how do we feel about Hank’s abuse of power and position? Is it acceptable for Marie to steal from shops? Does it make it more acceptable if she is mentally ill and unable to control herself? What about Walter’s activities? Do his motives make a difference? Do we believe that his motives are what he says they are?

And then there’s Tuco. While the other three examples could realistically be seen as examples of generally lawful people transgressing the law – pushing the envelope in some way – Tuco is a clear example of someone who lives entirely outside of the law. Jessie’s description of him to Walter in the RV is spot on. He lives outside the law, and outside of society. He represents the extreme end of the spectrum of transgression.

There is also the theme of the forbidden fruit tasting the sweetest. Walter and Skylar’s back seat rodeo was “so damned good”, as Walter points out, because it is illegal. The risk of getting caught adds some spice to it all.

Walter’s conversation with Hank about the arbitrary nature of deciding what is legal and what is illegal is, of course, the flimsiest of strawmen. It is obvious that some things are illegal for very good reasons. It is a halfhearted attempt to justify to himself that what he is doing “isn’t really so bad after all, is it?” His question to Skylar near the end of the episode about what she would do if it had been him shoplifting tiaras is a pretty clear indication that he knows he can’t keep his new hobby a secret from his wife forever. At the very least, if all of this money is going to go to his family she will find out about it at that point. Her response is also telling. I’m looking forward to seeing how that dynamic plays out over the next few seasons.

Perhaps the most interesting aspect of this episode, though, is the expression on Walt and Jessie’s faces at the end of the episode as they watch Tuco’s driver load the body of the other man into the car. The stunned horror on their faces is a clear indication that this is their first clear glimpse of how deep the depravity rabbit hole goes. What a great way to end the episode and to end the season. Season 2 looks to be very compelling.

Breaking Bad – Season 1, Episode 6

There are two major things I feel are worth talking about from this episode; the flash-forward (that’s the technical term for when foreshadowing and spoilers have a baby) at the beginning of the episode, and the masterful way in which Walter White’s internal conflict is manifesting in the world.

They are kind of the same thing, actually.

I recently read about research into the actual effect spoilers have on an audience. Turns out, knowing the ending actually enhances the enjoyment of a story. I guess that’s why Shakespeare is still popular after all these years. The reasoning behind this idea is that when you know what’s going to happen, you are free to enjoy the journey more. You can pay attention to the subtle nuance, the interplay of characters, you can appreciate the sheer inevitability of events and oh my god, the tension you can build.

I spent the whole episode knowing that, despite Walt’s admonition of no more violence at the beginning, he was going to end the episode with a bag of money in his hand and a building of exploded scumbags in the middle distance behind him. Every event in the episode, every decision, that image was brought back to mind in the back of my head. When Jessie called to say he had an in with Tuco, when he told Tuco he wanted money up front, when Walt found out what happened to Jessie…

That feeling of inevitability is what makes the anguish Walt feels at the end so effective. He didn’t want to be ‘that guy’ – he doesn’t want to be ‘that guy’. But he is that guy, and he had no real choice about it.

I still really expect that at some point Walt is going to embrace that part of himself, but until that time I’ll enjoy the hell out of his internal anguish.

Breaking Bad – Season 1, Episode 5

I feel like I’m getting the hang of the pacing for this show now. I figured we’d get mostly character development and then a reunion with Jessie at the end, and here we are.

What was interesting to me was the nature of the character development. Walt’s backstory with Elliot and Gretchen is particularly compelling – I hope we get to find out more about how things went sour between them all. Either way, we now have a much better understanding of why Walt is more willing to enter a life of crime for his remaining time than he is to accept help from his old friends. There are reservoirs of wounded pride and ill will here that seem to go so very, very deep. I have the feeling that Walt’s pride will be a recurring theme in upcoming seasons.

Also interesting was the fact that it was Skyler’s sister who seemed the most empathetic during the intervention that wasn’t an intervention. Given that she spent the first few episodes being a total asshole to her sister (and is a shoe thief), that surprised me. Fantastic acting from Betsy Brandt in that scene in particular.

I’ve not a clue what specifically is going to happen next. There are two more episodes in the season, so I expect another batch of meth will get cooked and something will go wrong and the season will end with Walt in danger of getting caught by his brother-in-law. It might have something to do with that respirator that got left behind after the first cook site.

I’m looking forward to finding out.

If you’re watching along with me, any thoughts? What complications do you see in Walt’s immediate future? The comments box is there for a reason 😉

Breaking Bad – Season 1, Episode 4

This was the episode I was expecting last time. A whole bunch foreshadowing, and Walt finally turns the corner!

The opening sequence in the DEA ready room confirms in my mind the idea that Walt becomes some sort of drug kingpin. I mean it’s not a far stretch even never having watched the show, given there are 5 seasons and the character has to go somewhere, but it’s nice to see some sort of more overt acknowledgement of the idea.

Jessie’s return home is a direct appeal to our sentimentality, a reminder that some bridges can never be re-crossed once they’ve been burned, and serves as a contrast to Walt’s opposite journey. It gives us a reason to believe that Jessie has no other options open to him. He can’t go home again.

Through most of the episode we see Walt trying vainly to hold on to some semblance of his old life, trying to go back to normal. He kicks Jessie out and tries to break ties. He has the in-laws over for a bbq.

The catalyst of Walt Jr. telling him to just give up and die if he doesn’t want to try and beat the cancer seems to be what pushes him through to finally commit to a decision. The final scene of him blowing up the douchebag’s car is a clear signal that he’s finally decided to live as though there are no consequences (although you’ll notice that he was cautious about not getting caught. Self-preservation is apparently a difficult habit to break).

The way that he dealt with the douchebag is also telling. That was a very ingenious way to destroy a vehicle (I’m not entirely sure it would blow up like that as opposed to just killing the battery and maybe starting a small fire under the hood, but hey – it’s TV), and he came up with it in a matter of seconds and then calmly and efficiently put it into action in not much more time than that.

When not crippled by indecision, he is a force to be reckoned with.

Next episode should see Walt stopping by Jessie’s place and getting the band back together. We should see more follow up on the DEA investigation, as well. It’s likely to be more of a character development episode, as opposed to an action packed one, but there might be the introduction of a new “big problem” sub-plot to replace the Emilio/Krazy 8 issue now that that has been resolved.

Breaking Bad – Season 1, Episode 3

An interesting turn of events, this. Many of the questions I had about Walter’s character remain unanswered, or answered in ways I wasn’t expecting.

He still hasn’t murdered anyone in cold blood. I wonder, though, that even after he knew that Krazy 8 had the piece of plate, he still maneuvered the situation around to where killing him was an act of self preservation.

On the plus side, Walter gets to maintain his moral ambiguity. He’s still doing bad things that harm people, but the harm is indirect and can be justified as being self-inflicted for the most part (I realise this contradicts the current popular view on drug addiction but fuck it, either we’re responsible for all of our own actions, or we’re responsible for none of them). He is also still doing those bad things for good reasons. as flimsy as that justification is.

On the negative side, we are left with a protagonist who still hasn’t completely committed himself to a course of action. He still hasn’t taken any steps that can’t be untaken or forgiven. Had he walked down there and used the hammer on the back of Krazy 8’s skull or sliced his throat open – even knowing that it was to protect his family from the possibility of murder – we would have looked at Walter differently. He would no longer have been out of place in “this line of work”.

I guess where I’m left dissatisfied is that I like my characters to be more clearly defined, and Walter White is not yet clearly defined. He is certainly not a hero, but nor is he truly an anti-hero. He is a sort of quasi-proto-hero, and that leaves me feeling vaguely unfulfilled.

Perhaps the conversation he’s about to have with Skyler about the cancer will give him the push he needs to hold the strength of his convictions. I’m still holding out hope for my theory about him taking over the drug industry and eliminating all rivals.

He just seems like that kind of guy.

I have a theory about where I think the show is heading, and it didn’t really fit in the last post, so I’ll put it here.

Given what we know about Walter thus far – he’s a very logical, straight-line-to-the-problem sort of man and has no patience for ineptitude – I see him coming to a very interesting conclusion. With what’s happening with Krazy 8 right now, it seems like the only way for Walter and Jessie to be safe in this endeavor of theirs is to take over the whole industry and remove all competition. This will have the added appeal in Walter’s mind of making sure that the whole thing is run properly.

It’s possible that he’s also planning ahead to when the cancer takes him out, and wants to make sure that when he goes, the drugs go away.

I wonder if the entire 5 seasons of the show are about Walter White taking over the meth business in the Southwest by any means necessary…

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